Showing posts with label Friends. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Friends. Show all posts

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Pay It Forward

It’s strange how things happen.  Many times we don’t realize the forces and influences at work behind the scenes in our lives.  One such force happened recently to a friend of mine.

As she traced back the sequence of events, it’s easy to believe that there’s some sort of master plan for all of us.  Call it fate, call it destiny, or call it God’s work.

My friend, I’ll call her Sharon (because that’s her name), works in marketing at a suburban Costco.  She’s pleasant,  can talk endlessly, and tells a heck-of-a-good story.  She’s the childhood friend I mentioned in my previous post.  The one I reconnected with after a 47 year absence while we both were busy raising our families and living our lives.

Sharon held a variety of positions.  She married and had her two children a bit later in life.  It was after her marriage that she began to live a privileged life…for a while.  While her two sons were still quite young, though, Sharon’s husband deserted them and Sharon ended up raising her sons as a single mother. 

Sharon pulled herself up, got a job, an apartment for herself and her two sons, and, eventually, sent both sons to college.  All the while, scrimping and saving (along with a student loan) so the oldest could attend school.  He has his degree now.   Job opportunities took him out of state and he is on his own now.  One down, one to go.

Son number two is also attending college.  As with many college boys, Son 2 tired of the college dorms after his Freshman year and opted to stay in a house on campus for this, his second year.  Big plans and lots of hyped-up talk between him and his friends had been taking shape for months and months.  Out of the dorm and into their own house.  As time went on and Freshman year came to a close, promises of living arrangements for Son 2 and the guys were forged…or so they thought.

Summer came and there was still excited talk of moving to a house on campus with friends.  But, boys will be boys.  It’s now the end of August and Sharon is beginning to get more than a little uneasy because final, concrete plans for her son’s living arrangements haven’t come to fruition yet.  Of course, Son 2 says not to worry and goes about HIS life without a care.

Finally, two days before the semester is about to begin, panic sets in (for Sharon)……no house or apartment to be found.  So now, mom sets into motion HER plan.  STAY IN THE DORM.  Of course Son 2 doesn’t want to hear of it and says he’ll just crash at a friend’s place.  Well……that ain’t gonna fly with Sharon.

Frantic phone calls to get a last minute dorm.  Nothing.  More phone calls.  Up the chain of command.  Nothing.  Sharon begs for a closet, even.  Nothing.  Countdown…One day ‘til school.

Meanwhile, back at Costco. A woman enters the store and proceeds to the Return counter.  The woman is obviously upset.  She has a telephone to return, minus the box, that she had purchased a couple weeks prior at another Costco location.  The phone, she explains to a young girl at the return desk, obviously is used as it has messages on the built-in answering machine.      

The young girl at the counter, trying to help, is beginning to get flustered herself.  She stops Sharon, who “just happens?” to be walking by, and asks her if, perhaps, SHE could take care of this woman’s predicament.

The worried woman returning the phone proceeds to tell Sharon her problems.  The woman told Sharon that she is the caretaker for an elderly man and had purchased this phone for him.  After the woman figured out the new phone was, indeed, used, she is now returning the phone to the store. 

While traveling the roads to her local Costco, there “just happened?” to be a terrible accident just ahead of her.  The roads were blocked from traveling any further, and traffic was backed-up for miles.  She explained to Sharon that she had ALMOST turned around to go home, but “just happened?” to detour around.  She had wrongly entered the freeway and didn’t really know which way she was travelling or exactly where she was going.  Twenty-Six MILES later, far out her way, she “just happened?” upon THIS Costco.

At an attempt to lighten the lady’s troubled state at being out of her familiar territory, Sharon “just happens?” to relay a “You-think-YOU’VE-got-troubles?…Listen-to-THIS” story.  Sharon began telling her the problem with Son 2 and his lack of living arrangements with school starting TOMORROW!  Sharon explained the endless calls she had made to the college to no avail and there were Absolutely.  No. Vacant.  Rooms.  Son 2 HAD to have a place to stay or his student loan would be withdrawn.  The hours were counting down.

Both women eventually found laughter though their shared tears while Sharon wrote up the return item and refunded the woman’s money.  The woman excused herself momentarily to place a phone call on her cell.  Minutes later she again stepped up to the Return line and, as a “thank-you,” slipped Sharon a piece of paper with a scribbled phone number on it.  The women asked Sharon to call that number saying it was the number of the elderly man she was caring for and it “just happens?” that, possibly, he could help with her son’s predicament.

The next morning, with Zero Hour approaching, Sharon was desperate.  It was the day before school was to start.  Sharon picked up the phone and obediently dialed the number that was scrawled on the crumpled paper.

An elderly gentleman finally answered after several rings.  Not knowing who this man was, friendly, great-story-telling- Sharon proceeded to share her dilemma with him.  The two began talking as if they were old friends.  The man finally asked for her number and said he would return her call within a couple of hours.

The minutes ticked away.   Finally.  It was the man again.  He told Sharon to jot down an address.  The address turned out to be a dorm room on the campus Son 2 was attending.

Just like that.  A room appeared.

One day later, Sharon “just happened?” to receive another call.  This call was from an elderly woman.  She wanted to thank Sharon! 

“Thank ME,” Sharon wondered?

The elderly woman explained that she was the wife of the elderly man.  She went on to relate a story about how, ever since he had been ill, her husband had been quiet and somewhat withdrawn sitting in his home-library for hours on end.  “But today,” she beamed, “he’s been bouncing around here like a new man!”  The wife went on to say that just the fact that he could do a favor for someone who needed his service made him feel alive again.  So she thanked Sharon again.

Is it fate?  ls it destiny?  Is it God’s work?  Next time YOU meet a stranger, pay YOUR good fortune forward.  It could “just happened?” that YOU may be helping someone… or… it could “just happen?” that THEY may be helping YOU.   

We’re all connected in one way or another…..whether we realize it or not.

Monday, October 17, 2011

Two Score and Seven Years Ago

I recently had the pleasure of attending a reunion.  Not a college or high school reunion.  But a reunion of my Catholic grade school – the Our Lady of Grace 8th Grade Class of 1964 from Dearborn Heights, Michigan.

LIFE happened in those narrow halls - those classrooms that sat 50 students each - and in the adjoining church.  It’s where we shared our lives, learned together, worshiped together and played together throughout our formative years.  Our classmates were our neighbors.  We knew one another’s parents and siblings.  We grew up together in a simpler time, and we were part of the Our Lady of Grace family.

Forty –seven years ago, 150 of us innocent 8th grade students, left the confines and security of the Catholic school halls we had roamed lined-up in for the past 8 years.  For the first time, we were leaving behind our safe, secure friendships.  We were now parting – splitting - to attend one of a dozen or so high schools in the area.  Traveling our separate ways, but each carrying inside us that solid foundation which was to remain with us for the rest of our lives.

So it was with much enthusiasm that I looked forward to seeing old friends that I hadn’t seen in 47 years!  I must say, and I’ve been told -- to my benefit, and even to my detriment -- that I have a most accurate memory.  I knew just about everyone there…and there were close to 100 people who came out to celebrate our past that day.  What a testament to our happy childhoods!

While enjoying acquaintances, I kept my eyes peeled for a few of my very best friends.  Funny how 47 years can slip by so quickly. 

There she was!  In walked one of my favorite partners-in-crime.  You know, things like prank phone calls (Is your refrigerator running?), eating burgers and drinking phosphates at the drug store counter (each visit paid with a silver dollar “borrowed” from my friend’s much older brother’s coin collection…OMG). 

My friend and I tried our first (and my last) cigarette together.  We sang “Goin’ to the Chapel” in harmony thinking we sounded every bit as “cool” as the Crystals…and we DID!  And by the grace of God, our short bouts of pyromania on my friend’s kitchen table didn’t erupt into anything serious!

We looked for boys together – dreamily, from afar - at the nearby Detroit public pools, at the outdoor ice pond in the winter, and spent many many Sunday afternoons in the movie theater watching every Beach Party movie starring Annette and Frankie.   

Most importantly, we LAUGHED together.  We laughed in church…all the time (in our defense, we had to attend mass EVERYDAY), which invited trouble from the Principal, Sister Leticia.  Even 10 whacks with a ruler on the knuckles couldn't stifle the giggles. 

One time a teacher stopped teaching the class until my friend and I stopped laughing.  We tried to contain the laughter, but as our shoulders bobbed up and down uncontrollably , and the snorts of laughter seeped out, the whole class couldn’t help but join in the infectious, hysterical laughter.

My friend and I have reconnected now.  Lots of laughter again, too.  Phone calls that go on and on into the wee morning hours.  It’s almost as if no time had passed!   We’re still playing catch-up with these crazy lives of ours.  Talk of family, children, ex’s, and how our lives turned out, and how much more we still have to do.